MomStar how may I assist you today?

Some people rely on OnStar; my boys rely on MomStar.

This year, our youngest son will be 18 and our oldest will be 21.  By most people’s estimations, the parenting job is done.  The boys are both adults in different frames of reference.  They can both vote, one can legally drink, they can both be drafted, they can enter into sales contracts and manage their own medical information.  Seriously?  The only difference between being 12 and 21 is the proximity of mom to help out when they get in over their head.   The level of  common sense growth only increases in due course and proximity to actual failure and learning curve.We determined this service to be as useful as OnStar available on most late-model vehicles.  WE call it MomStar. Their phones have a direct dial button with this label, I'm almost sure.  It will start with a text, usually in the middle of a workday.  “Is MomStar available?”

Over the course of the text discussion the nature of advice may run from diagnosing a sinus infection, laundry stain removal, recipe consulting, on the fly budgeting "I have $43. What groceries should I get for a week?", GPS location of misplaced objects in the home, how to accomplish too many things in a short time frame - also known as our genetic trait coming from the Mr. of PROcrastination - but that's a whole nother story.

 

The amount of topics on which I have levied advice through text parenting would astound Dr. Spock. He would surely say that parenting through text is not an effective method of spending quality time and interaction.  Has he ever tried to impart common sense, knowledge or advice on a child between 12 and 20?  If they are not in the mood, the only way to reach is through text mode.

Over the last ten years, parenting by text mode has been the preferred method of parents who want to extend the distance of their umbilicus.  For those of us who fancy having a life while parenting, the cell phone has been both a curse and a blessing.  It's the first thing we can take away as punishment, but usually find it punishes us more if the kid doesn't have it and we need to impart wisdom, advice or instruction.  As with most punishments, it's harder on us than it is on them.

There was a term called helicopter parenting that I was loathe to admit was my tendency - swooping to avert disaster when natural consequences would have been a better life lesson.  I think I have adjusted my trajectory over the years to the point we haven't had any tragic consequences but we have had some costly mistakes both in ego and finances.  

I will be intrigued to see what the next generation of parenting will bring.  Blue tooth headsets with visual capabilities so we can avert disaster at a moments notice - "Billy!  Do not touch! HOT!"  Applies to both appliances at 2 and wayward females at 15 with equal clarity.  We already have video baby monitors and safety bracelets that beep if child is more than 5 feet away from caregiver's bracelet.

The protection of our human investment in our progeny is one that takes much focus and energy.

The constant battle to save our children from mortal peril as opposed to letting them learn by exposure and come to terms with making decisions on their own has been a challenge through the ages.  Thankfully, we no longer have to worry about ravaging nomads and prehistoric creatures carrying them off.  But sometimes I was tempted to put them on the market for a bargain price.  In retrospect, I'm glad I kept them both, they could end up to be a good return on my investment at some point in the future.