Travels with Mom

Family vacation season is fast approaching and I have a lengthening list of all the incidentals that I will need to pack that no one else in my family will think of - until it is a vital necessity.  Tweezers, nail clippers, band aids, sunscreen, insect bite cream, cotton swabs, safety pins, toothpaste, hair gel… etc.  The weirdest request. -  “Mom, do we have any rice?” became a classic after youngest son failed to remove his phone from shorts pocket, before cannon-balling into pool.  Realized his error the moment he hit the water of course.  Phone did survive the baptism after spending time in a bag of uncooked rice.

On our first trip with three generations - me, mom, grandma - traveling to South Dakota when I was 5.  First, the ONLY hijacking in SeaTac airport history delayed our flight for hours.  This was back in the mid-1970s, prior to heightened security measures.  My so articulate 5 year old level of “Stupid hijackers, go away. Who wants to go to Cuba anyway?” didn’t work.  Then when our baggage was changing planes one of the suitcases fell off the trolley and opened on the tarmac.  Nothing like seeing your mother’s unmentionables strewn from hell to breakfast.  A memorable trip on so many levels.

Traveling with mom is much like traveling with a 5 year old, turnabout is fair play.  A woman prone to sensible shoes, hers usually tie and and between managing jewelry that tripped the alarm, an unwieldy handbag and too much to carry – she now has a metal plate in her wrist. All kinds of circus acts are happening when she goes through the gate.  So there we are before and after the security check with me on the floor untying and retying her shoes, while she rearranges her baggage.

Mom also tends to get distracted by rude people, other people’s issues, most shiny objects and technology snafus.  On our last trip to see grandson #1 at college, we were managing an acoustic guitar case, 4 suitcases, 2 backpacks and 3 people.  I had to send grandson #2 to retrieve things more often than he was comfortable to keep all of our assorted accoutrements together. We only lost mom once in the process.  We determined next time we’re going to put a helium balloon on her coat zipper to use as a locating device.  Her diminutive stature makes it hard to see her in a crowd.

Once we left the airport, trying to navigate CA hwy system with mom reading road and street signs and son using phone GPS… which is more effective?  We arrived at our hotel – booked through AOL dial up on the internet only to realize it was on the flight path of the community airport for the rich and famous coming in and out of Monterey and Carmel.  Small private Cessna and Beechcraft jets started buzzing at 6am daily and lingered past 10pm.  We were treated to a front row seat, and had to cross a freeway off-ramp to turn into our hotel.  Mom takes me to only the best places.  

This reminds me of another trip with mom to a family reunion in South Dakota.  She was coordinating all the specifications for a family reunion.  We travel as a group of 8 people all day from Seattle to Utah to South Dakota and arrive at 10pm in a remote area to discover our reservation starts TOMORROW night.  Somewhere the arrival dates were changed on the flight but not on the resort.  I was about ready to start pounding on doors to rent someone’s bathtub for the night.  Exhausted and at the end of my tolerance level – I dissolved into hysterics and tears.  A room was found – not a tactic I recommend, but in the right application, useful.

Then there was the next family reunion five years later in Colorado - equally memorable.  I was flying separately meeting my parents in Colorado.  As our plane landed, alarms were sounding and we parked on the tarmac for an hour until we received weather clearance to proceed to the terminal due to “thunderstorms.”  The elderly farmer in the seat next to me peered out the window and proclaimed with experienced certainty, “Thunderstorms, hell.  Them’s tornado clouds!”  

Urge to bail activated and NO cocktail service!  When we finally deplaned, it was news on all the weather channels that THREE tornado funnels had touched down within a mile of the runway.   My folks were watching them touch down from the cell phone waiting lot and sweating bullets.  Our next stop upon leaving the airport was a bar for a well-deserved libation to calm our frazzled nerves.

Within the last month, we travelled to Puyallup with mom for our annual staycation for Mother’s Day weekend where we take time to connect, relax, regroup and rejuvenate away from the demands of home.  My sister booked a hotel, we picked mom up at home and each of us packed a corkscrew to open our one bottle of wine – something we’d overlooked in the past.  No harm, no foul, no tornadoes, no highjackers and just a few hungover hillbillies for entertainment purposes.  It has taken a few learning opportunities to convince us to take over the planning and reservation making roles and let mom choose the wine and restaurants.  We all travel much easier that way, but it makes for good anecdotal evidence to be turned into a whole nother story.